Often times we think we have no choice but to stay in darkness…not realising Light would illuminate all our darkness in a split second – if only we choose to turn it on…x
Turn on the Light...
Turn on the Light...
Often times we think we have no choice but to stay in darkness…not realising Light would illuminate all our darkness in a split second – if only we choose to turn it on…x
Okay sooooooooooo I have no money...seriously none...my savings have run out...hehehe...and I don't know what tomorrow is going to bring!! I have no idea where I am heading and having left the security of a full time job three months ago...I do not actually have a pay check coming in any time soon...hahahaha...
In the middle of this hoo haa credit crunch this nation seems to be involved in...there I am still not looking for work...or even considering working for anybody ever again...hmmmm...anyhoo...left, right and centre, I'm hearing about all the price increases...the petrol...the budget cuts...the doom and gloom...sighs galore...
Obviously if I didn't know God as my Source I’d too be kaking myself...if you don't know God you should be worried...however because I do know God and His Faithfulness...I'm expectant...and confident...so I am about to go for it with my fun lil business venture (http://www.livinginlight.co.uk/) by launching the next collection (during the next few hours...expect an email...woohoo) rather than do something safe and secure...
I am quite aware that because my savings have now totally been rinsed I have nothing to fall back on if the business doesn't work...or if the workshops I want to start up don't kick off...in the natural it would seem that I'll have NOTHING! Hahahaha...
BRILLIANT ISN'T IT???!
I KNOW!!! I've totally been pondering my position of seemingly having nothing...reflecting upon the last few incredible months of my life...marvelling at my recent adventure of taking all that I have had in my hands and known in my heart and having sown it to the best of my ability...reminiscing over the last three months...just loving the joy of waking up each day in a bubble of leisurely bliss...spending time in worship, enjoying the freedom of just being...without structure or direction in my life yet being the most productive I have EVER been...creating day after day...writing...drawing...designing and sewing...breaking and mending things...building and constructing...growing and flourishing...investing and re-investing into all that I can see in my hands...all with a passion and resolution unlike anything I have ever known...
Sigh...and now I have done all that I can for now...sown all that is in my hands...I have prayed...I have believed...and I have joyfully exhausted it all...and now it would seem I have NOTHING left...smiles...
As I write this I smile...hahaha...because despite me having the time of my life over the last three months...this is actually where the real fun begins...this place of me having nothing left in my hands...this here is the ultra cool part...this is when I sit back because I've done all I can...hoping that I have been faithful with what small I was given, and now all that remains is for me to watch the next phase of the adventure kick in...the beauty of destiny unfolding exceedingly abundantly above anything I could ever ask or imagine...deliciously unwrapping before my very eyes...whatever it might me...maybe it will be the website or it won't...maybe the workshops...maybe the other things God's put in my heart...may be He'll tell me to get a job working for some one...I dunno...I really don't...I just know that it's gonna be good...whatever it's gonna be...it's gonna be really really good...
Hahahaha...to me that's totally what adventurous living is all about...xx
A little bit of fun from the new Living in Light Jewellery range. x
Soooooooooooo I went to the House of Lords to see a Film screening...An Angel Award winning Japanese film called Jun Ai...obviously I made sure I looked half decent seeing as I wanted to look nice for all the Lords, Earls and Ladies...and at the same time I wanted to avoid getting arrested or raising any suspicions...i'm serious...smiles...the amount of police presence at Parliment always makes me think they'll arrest someone just to kill time...its funny how there's always far more police than visitors...but don't ya just love our uniformed angels...always without fail soooo polite and cute...bless our nations 5.O!!!
Sooooo this film Jun Ai...Oh me gosh...definitely a fab watch...set in the 40's in China when Japan invaded them and the Chinese were mistreated by the Japanese military hardcore...but there were Japanese refugees that fled to China for safety who then had to deal with the hatred of the Chinese...anyhoo the film looks at the relationship between a Chinese man and Japanese woman and how true love overcomes everything...a real heart-warming story which also raises awareness about childbirth and the poor conditions in which babies are delivered around the world...seriously moving...thought provoking for sure!
Keiko Kobayasi
See the thing was this though...it wasn't the film so much that moved me...but the heart behind it... Keiko Kobayasi, the woman who produced the film also starred in it...and we met the entire cast who were promoting the film...obviously people promote their films...but they were doing so, not from a place of selfish gain but as a vessel to promote peace across nations...wow...they were truly seeking to promote JUN AI...True love...man...that enlarged my heart...this lovely lady is going around the world with this beautiful story that she used her talents and gifts to make and star in and now she is using her compassion, gift of communication and sheer determination to use the film as a platform for world peace...and she's not even in a beauty pageant!! (Not that she couldn't be - she's pretty darn beautiful).
Not only that but Jun Ai is actually a charity that helps children - many schools around the Far East have been built from the proceeds from this film!! It's mental!! Soooo beautiful! And as I sat there in the House of Lords I was so touched by the humanitarian spirit and generosity of all those involved...people that want to be a blessing...want to see the world become a better place...people that have used their position, wealth and heart to find the best surroundings...the best platform and most suited connections to raise both awareness and well needed funds to help someone...
Common enough in the Christian world...yes...but the reason I was touched is because faith did not even come into it...this wasn't a Christian charity but a humanitarian one (even though I realise that it is the love of God in you that drives you to be good to others whether you know Him or not)...it was people that didn't know God wanting to reach out in love!! Sometimes as Christians we can think that its only in a Christian capacity that compassion can truly be effective...but I was struck by the good will and empathy of these beautiful souls who have not yet even truly encountered a heavenly LOVE but out of what they have they gave...beautiful...beautiful...beautiful!!
Definitely a thought provoking experience for me...one I welcome...anything that humbles me and keeps my heart in check is much needed cause you know how that yucky pride creeps in if you don't keep reminding yourself of the amazing goodness in others!! If you want to find out more about this beautiful art movement and how you can donate to the JUN AI organisation contact the guys at The Wisdom Trust who are their contact in the UK...at: http://www.wisdom4all.co.uk/
In terms of life pour moi...well what can I say...it's exactly three months today since I left my job as a teacher and the joy just continues to knock me out...its scandalous...still totally on the creative flex...filling up my days with making...writing...thinking...being... loving...delicious delicious days of discovery!! The new collection should be on line soon so check out http://www.livinginlight.co.uk/ over the next few weeks to see the fun stuff I've put on there and yes feel free to go ahead and buy everything!!
xxx
For lil ol me, this has been a year all about the risk taking...Yay! I gotta say it has been a year of truly entering into a lifestyle of freedom…of living more dangerously and authentically seeking the thrill of stepping out in faith…and you know what…it has turned out to be simply yummy! Can I share just a couple of my adventures of this year with you…?
Sooo…pursuing my love of drama and joining an acting class had been a huge risk for me, trust me! Hahaha! When you have to stand up in front of people week after week and act crazy knowing that you might get laughed has totally been an adventure. Having to expose my inners acting "mad", "sad", or "glad" was not an easy feat (my fellow thespians will agree with me I'm sure!), oh but it was so darn rewarding even when I did fail!! And trust me I failed repeatedly. Lol! But the joy of coming through and growing in character and overcoming my pride, fears and anxieties was hooooooooge!! To discover that I loved acting even more than I love fashion was totally a thrill! Imagine if I'd never pursued it for risk of failure?! So much has come of it! I've opened another door of creativity in my life? Whoop whoop!! Did I become the next big star? Hardly! But am I glad I took the risk? YES! YES! YES!!
And then there was the small matter of me leaving the teaching profession after eight years. Talk about a precarious move!! Hahaha! Soooo God showed me in the summer that it was time for me to leave my job as a Secondary school teacher. So I say OKAY!!! And I handed in my resignation! Did I know where I was heading? No? Was it an easy place to leave? Again - NO!! I had tons of different roles, untold opportunities, perks and privileges and a faaaaaaaat salary…so why leave the security?? Because security is safe and does not equate destiny!! And destiny is dangerous but brings forth true adventure!! Seriously…where's the adventure in SAFE?? There's nothing courageous about the comfort zone! There's nothing razzmatazz about the rat race!! And although I have nooooooooooo idea what the future holds for me I knew I know it’s gonna be exciting!! I know I could have done it the safe way where I waited for God to bring me another job and then resigned but that's just DRY!! And so I took the plunge and I have absolutely no regrets about stepping out in faith…on the contrary it feels DELICIOUS!!!
Then there’s the greatest risk I have taken this year…walking in LOVE! I know it sounds corny!! Sick bucket purleeeeeeeeeeeeease! I don't care what you say but TRUE UNCONDITIONAL LOVING is a dangerous game because you gotta totally put yourself on the line! You have to totally expose your inners and choose to see the best in people, choose to ignore your pride, choose to not get offended, choose to get rejected, choose to forgive again and again and again and again…and then when you've been battered, bruised and broken from LOVE cause it hurts so much, you gotta keep on keeping on and love even deeper than you thought you had in you!!!! CRAZY LOVE!!
Yet despite the deep vulnerability I faced of truly yielding to walking in love it held the greatest reward of this year. There has been nothing quite like responding to evil with love, nor have I experienced anything quite as beautiful as letting love be become my heartbeat… finding that in the encounters that have come your way each day I have had the choice to let LOVE dictate my words, thoughts and actions. It has truly become a beautiful adventure. Am I saying I have always succeeded in the LOVE WALK this year? Nooooooooooooo!!! Despite my best efforts of walking in love, many a time I have instead acted like a pit-bull!! Hahahha! But that's the joy of it, knowing that I mess up everyday but being able to get back up again and again and DARING to try again!!
Sooooooooooooooo lollipops!! I don't know what your riskiest, most vulnerable battles are…but may you be free to pursue the dangerous in order to gain the truly wonderful…And may this poem speak to you like it has spoken to me…
To laugh is to risk appearing the fool,
To weep is to risk appearing sentimental,
To reach out for another is to risk involvement,
To expose feelings is to risk exposing your true self,
To place your ideas, your dreams before the crowd is to risk their loss.
To love is to risk not being loved in return,
To live is to risk dying,
To hope is to risk despair,
To try is to risk failure,
But risks must be taken, because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing.
The person who risks nothing, does nothing, has nothing, is nothing,
He may avoid suffering and sorrow, but he simply cannot learn, feel, change, grow, love....live.
Chained by his certitude's, he is a slave;
He has forfeited freedom,
Only a person who risks is TRULY free.
So as this year comes to a close and a new year full of possibilities, discoveries and miracles invites us to dream in a new season…I dare you to TAKE A RISK…whatever that may mean for you…x
I made a conscious decision to not concentrate on anything other than a few key things in my life over the last month and one of those key things was to SLEEP!! I have spent tooo long not comprehending the true value of sleep and deceived myself into thinking that I was some sort of Xena Warrior Princess and that I could concentrate on all the projects I'm involved in whilst holding down a full time job…adequately spin all the plates without dropping a single one…and do all this without getting barely any sleep...DOH...I'm beginning to now realise that sleep deprivation is totally for losers!! And now that I have finally had that revelation, I feel total peace at putting everything down...
Sometimes we foolishly think we really do have to do everything that comes our way but actually there's totally a season for picking stuff up and putting stuff down...I had that revelation a few days ago as I driving down the A406 – pretty much on autopilot as I made my way to work as a teacher…that basically I didn't need to be worrying about a getting a thousand things in order to make destiny happen...on the contrary, the voice in my heart told me that I needed to put all the things that I was killing myself trying to achieve in the midst of holding down a full time job...on the backburner...and just REST my mind!!!
And then it kinda dawned on me that I had become like a silly little hamster going round and round a wheel trying to get my creative flow on with my tired and busted self whilst I had a thousand things going on and I was not GETTING ANYWHERE! As I shared my anxieties with God, sat behind the wheel praying, I felt a gentle release as I got the revelation that sounded something along the lines of..."RELAX silly billy...BREATHE and sense the season"...And then suddenly the eyes of my heart saw the bigger picture… I was trying to do so much when in fact this season for me was about KEEPING THINGS SIMPLE! Right there and then I resolved to stop sweating the small stuff, to just relax and keep my eyes on the goal.
Following that little revelation the struggle completely left me and I dived into “REST YOUR MIND” mode. The funny thing is that since then, I have found myself looking forward to a half term week off from work and finally feeling rested enough to get my creative groove on...excited to find myself producing the next collection for the Living in Light label...excited about maybe writing some more of my manuscript...painting, dancing...reading ...woohoo...Yet I have woken up on the first day of half term and my dear heart, without even once consulting my mind has cheekily decided that it wants all the creative stuff to WAIT...because all my heart wants to do for the entire week is jam with Jesus!!
So that's exactly what we are doing…me and my heart...we are jamming with Jesus…I realised this morning that this is in fact all that I need to do!...God had given me so many divine concepts that they are almost bursting out of my seams...I feel I have so so so much to do... such little time...so much to plan...so much to execute...YET the only way I'll ever get to know how to do it...when to do it and why to do it, is by spending treasured time with HIM!!! Note to self: All things must first be birthed in INTIMACY!!
People say they have so much to do that they can't afford to spend time with God...but the truth peeps is that it's because we have so much to do that WE CAN'T AFFORD NOT TO SPEND TIME WITH HIM!!
But get this…the craziest thing is this...as you turn your heart completely towards HIM you find yourself creatively stirred up anyway, by being in His innately creative presence...unbelievably you will often times achieve far more substance from the creative flow that is conceived by default, in alone time in God's intimate presence - than weeks, even months of soulish striving could ever attain.
Wow…how mental…How simple…yet HOW DELICIOUSLY DIVINE!!
If we don't laugh we will surely die. If we don't find that pure place where we regularly just crack up and topple over in fits of hysterical laughter, something will surely die deep inside. We were created to laugh. We were created to laugh with one another. With laughter life is enriched. I love this shot of the girls from the very first Living in Light shoot. It radiates absolute joy. Undiluted.
It captures so effortlessly the delightful bliss of an abundant life. This shot I guess has it all...fun, fashion, friendship...all that the magazines indicate, an independent chick aspires to have in her life...but the beautiful thing is that it's not an orchestrated shot.
It's not a facade, manipulated to evoke an emotion so that people will see it, want to be it and then realise one day that it's just an illusion...let's face it, most of the time the shots we see in magazines and adverts are all just that - a fantasy - and behind all the airbrushing, smiley faces and perfect features are the lies, heartache and reality.
Yet contrary to some of the magazines and billboards out there this snap of the girls is to me, a beautiful snapshot of a truly joyful life...its a delicious glimpse of being able to actually have it all...it tells me that you can be stylish...sassy and sincerely happy...without compromising, without pretending and without selling out. So many of us have at one point or another compromised ourselves to be happy...we've relied on something or someone to make us happy...we've sometimes settled for the worst in a bid to get a glimpse of the best...we've stepped on others to satisfy our pleasure...i'm sure we've all been guilty of looking for happiness in all the wrong places...we've all even pretended to be happy when inside we feel like CRAP! Lol!
But this picture tells a different story. In fact I know it's not even a story because I was there. It's a picture of deep joy - it's not a moment of happiness based on circumstances...nor is it an outcome of looking so hot (obviously wearing the Bianca Pants would make anyone look hot). It's not laughter induced pride, by drink, drugs, people pleasing or false confidence.
It's pure undiluted joy, an inner confidence, a calm delight that comes from them knowing who they are and whose they are. What about you. Do you know who you are? Do you know whose you are??? Does it bring you joy?
Whats the joyometer in your life saying. Where's your inner delight coming from...What's your confidence in?
UNDILUTED JOY. It's yours if you want it.
Photography by Michelle Moreland.
Models: Anna Omak, Robyn Matthews & Annabel Spooner
I'm smiling. Permanently. There's nothing quite as delicious as being free.
I'm sitting here thinking that I suppose that's what sometimes drives people to do the craziest, sometimes the most selfish or at times the most unexplainable things - because they get a taste of being free - and then they spend their whole life pursuing what they deem to be freedom - and they run towards it - at the same time running away from all the things that make them feel trapped.
Running away from the monotony of their lives, from the 9-5 drill, from the boring marriage, from their mundane education...whatever it might be the whole world is full of people seeking or even desperately attempting to re-live that sweet sense of liberty...sometimes stretching out...frustrating and pushing...re-enacting that moment they first felt free...be it their first trip alone...their first drug...their first kiss...their first wild haircut...their first piercing...thinking that maybe if they keep chasing their desires they might actually feel free...they may finally feel satisfied…if they can just get to the other side, the grass just might be greener.
But see in the end it doesn't satisfy. True freedom wasn't made for us just to taste once and never truly experience again in its fullness - true freedom is a place of fulfilment that never loses its taste...a place where you can feast again and again. It's a place where you can dwell forever...and the more of yourself you surrender to it...the freer it becomes...
Smiles. xx
Image from http://wallpaperswa.com
HELLO DESTINY!
There's nothing like getting the G.R.E.E.N. L.I.G.H.T to go ahead into the next season of life...the next adventure...the next ASSIGNMENT...when you have faith brewing at record level...that supersized hope...expectation the size of Africa...that delicious place of anticipation...that yummy place of being pregnant with destiny...Yerrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!
I don't know where you're at but I gotta tell you, WE HAVE SOOOO MUCH IN US!! We should be using our hands, minds, and spirits to be productive and not relying on one job or stream to bring in our income!! We should have different avenues of fruitfulness from the different areas of productivity in our lives.
We were created to be creative...we should have idea after idea being nurtured in our lives. We have solutions to problems stored in us...we have witty inventions deep in our core...
So what ideas have you got generating in your spirit?...in your hands?...in your mind??? Maybe you had ideas when you were younger but then your hopes got dashed...or maybe people rejected your ideas and now you feel dead...stir it up baybeeeee...let hope arise again and start dreaming again...
You see...we have got to reproduce...we must bear fruit...not just in the womb but with our hands, our minds and spirit...with our lips in what we say...We've got to have that brainchild...that handchild...you've got to birth the thing in your spirit and then you've got to name it!!
People name their children...what's your brain child called? Where's your product??? You're wearing everyone else's clothes, using everyone else's technology...eating everyone else's food...singing everyone else's song...when are people going to read your book...sing your song...wear your clothes???????????
Deep deep deep!! Green light. Go. Create the environment for yourself to be fruitful. Believe in your idea. Believe in yourself. Believe in your Creator. And GO FOR IT...YOU'VE GOT THE GREEN LIGHT!
x
Okaaaay...so I'm just waiting for all the techie geeky stuff to be sorted until the Living in Light website can go live...soooo mind numbingly boring...trust me, there's only so many times you can have a conversation about managing domains, URL's and nameservers before you want to kill yourself...yet I am kind of getting excited...because I’m thinking to myself...yay I'm going to finally have a little business...yet at the same time a part of me is wondering...what if no one wants to buy the stuff?...And what if everyone thinks the website is lame...? What if I fail miserably? And then I am reminded...lol...that I actually don't care...
And it really REALLY doesn't matter because more than anything, it’s about stepping out...about taking what you've got and doing something with it...taking risks and not fearing the failure...it’s about having fun with life and extending your boundaries each day in some new way...woohoo...it’s about proving faithful with your stuff!
I have seriously had just sooooo much fun doing the first shoot...Anna, Annabelle and Robyn...all modelling for me... Michelle, Ondine and Shaun doing the photography...wow they totally rocked. I even had Ron help me with the location and my own lil runner...thanks Jen. The shoot photo's exceeded my expectations totally. I lurved the fashion pictures. To think I was originally going to postpone the shoot because I had so much going on. Yet deep down I knew I wanted to go ahead and get this baybeee on the road…and maaan, I'm so glad that I did…
That's the thing though...you can kind of avoid doing things because you think they aren't going to happen quite the way you want them to happen...so we can often have a tendency to not even go through with our ideas or our dreams - for fear of the finished result not being good enough…so we almost give up before we even get started...but the thing is this...it's soooo much more exciting, liberating and powerful to actually GO FOR IT...and to just see what happens...EVEN if it goes nowhere…and hey, if you do fail in one aspect - no matter what - you'll have stepped out, you'll have come out of your comfort zone and strengthened who you are...we all know Edison - the dude who developed the final light bulb concept - well he must have tried untold times and messed up repeatedly before he actually succeeded in creating something that could realistically be used...so the lesson for us all is…before we can succeed we will often FAIL! Note to self…failure does not have to be scary!!
And the most amazing thing is this...when you surround yourself with creativity and share your vision with love...you simply can't fail...I know...pass me the sick bucket...its all soooo frickin mushy...but it's true!
And another super amazing thing is that when you persevere and push through a door that you'd only ever previously allowed yourself to glimpse through the keyhole of, it's amazing what lies on the other side…even if it's not what you expected. Often times…the door leads to better places of opportunity. Cameron my gorgeous lil niece recently said something pretty deep to me for a mere seven year old. She happened to ask me if she could hold the keys to my classroom at school. And then getting pretty excited she informed me that..."She loved keys!! She really did…”I love them because they get you into places..." she said...
I love that. It has prompted me to consider what keys I have in my hand…and the only keys I feel I am carrying right now are my creativity…my ability to design, sew and my passion to write. That's all I have to open the door to Living in Light. As small as my keys are they are all I need to get started. So question for you…what are the keys in your life people...what are your talents, gifts, abilities, resources...what are your passions? Are you using them to get through the doors to destiny? Have you tapped into the keys you hold in your hand and are you using them to get you where you really wanna go?????
Don't hesitate…go on…give it a bash…I dare ya…just take what's in your hand and dare to use it...start today if you haven't already...because those little keys are your secret weapon (I know it sounds crazy but it isn't!!) and trust me the doors they unlock lead to more than you could ever imagine…but first you must be willing to make a start with the little you have.
xxx