Mercy Me

I found myself on the tube the other night...fairly late...probably way past 11pm.  Once again it was the ever eventful Central Line that I was travelling on...and as usual the carriage was jammed packed...everyone crushed like sardines...accept on this particular occasion most of the sardines were drunk. And quel surpris, I found myself faced with an encounter that got me thinking...

The encounter went something like this...A nice man made space for me and smiled as I clambered onto the carriage. A few moments after the tube set off, he asked me if I'd like to have his candle. His very expensive candle apparently.  I was pretty knackered from a crazy couple of loooong days and wasn't in the most chattiest of moods...but nevertheless I smiled and asked how come? He explained that he had been given a candle at an event, from a very high calibre brand - but he couldn't be bothered to carry it on his night out...and he'd rather give it away to someone lovely on the train instead...(apparently).  Obviously I knew he was harmless - just waxing lyrical...being a smooth operator and that..but I smiled anyway and said yeah sure. I was hoping that, this was the end of our little tête à tête, and I now could hopefully just zone out and catch some zzzz's.

He was just about to hand it to me when suddenly, his über arrogant bald headed Asian mate who was a bit too merry for his own good and clearly not happy about the rather generous, undeserved, gesture his friend was about to extend...piped up and practically started frothing at the mouth. "You can't do that!" He scoffed. "Ask her if she even knows what brand it is? Has she ever even heard of Hublot? Let her answer the question first!" Cringe galore. He was totes opinionated that's for sure. He looked at me and (with slightly hooded eyes due to his alcohol consumption) endeavoured to challenge me. "Do you even know who Hublot are?" I don't really think he was interested in my response. He graciously enlightened me. "They are a f***ing high end luxury brand!" How charming, I thought to myself. The fella was on a soapbox hardcore and he wasn't coming down for anybody. 

I looked at this Asian dude and then back at the poor White guy who was just tryna be nice and explained..."mate I really ain't that fussed. I don't know who Hublot are...never heard of them...not really into brands or even into candles for that matter...i'm more than happy for you to keep your candle". Charming Asian bloke is still scoffing away as the lovely English man looks embarrassed and persuades me to please take the candle and simply ignore the Asian bloke. Okay so the situation is becoming trés awkward by thus point because Indian arrogant man is now raising his wrist in the air showing me and every other sardine on the entire carriage his £35K Hublot watch...still insisting this is a "f***ing luxury brand you know...that candle he's just given you is worth a lot of money you know".  He then proceeds to tell everyone about the designer brands he wears daily...how much dough he's got...how Ilford is a S***hole - before finally adding that most schools are filled with refugees who are all apparently criminals. Nice.

Every inch of my being soooo wanted to tell this joker a few home truths about his deeply unattractive, arrogance - and his foolish love for mammon...but taking a deep breath, reminding myself I'm a Christian, I chose to ignore his alcoholic rant and talked to his nice friend instead. We talked about church, as I was on the way back from a worship night. We talked about my day teaching in a really rough school and then about his job as a McDonalds Franchise owner where he was making lots of money...with kids at private school...who just wanted to give his children what he hadn't had in life. Although I was cream cracked I enjoyed briefly chatting to him. He clearly was a nice guy and had a heart to bless.

As I got off the carriage a short while later with my very expensive candle that I actually didn't give a flying fig about, I found myself thinking about the lovely gesture that the guy who's name I found out was Jerry had carried out. I then thought about his friend who simply couldn't accept his friend's gesture of grace and didn't want me to receive this freebie until, in his eyes I was qualified enough to receive such an expensive gift. It wasn't long before he reminded me of the big brother in the parable of the prodigal son (Luke 15). I reflected upon how he also reminded me of the full day workers who had grumbled when the eleventh hour workers had got paid the same amount as them (Matthew 20). I then considered how he actually reminded me of how Christians can be towards one another. And then suddenly, dare I say it...he reminded me of me.

I was immediately convicted of those moments when I have wanted someone to qualify for a blessing...or for grace...the times that I have not rejoiced at someone's blessing of favour and instead somewhere in my subconscious I have wanted them to earn it...the moments where I have wondered why someone got blessed when in my eyes they simply didn't deserve it...those times when someone in my limited understanding and my tarnished heart had been able to apparently bypass the appropriate labour and seemingly "correct" process and get promoted in the blink of an eye...when surely they should have "proved more faithful, right?"

Or, those pitiful occasions when I have wanted someone to go through a loooong process before I felt they were faithful enough...before I felt they were worthy of recognition or praise...before I felt they were mature enough to receive the attention. Wow, Lord have mercy on me for every moment when I have resisted the work of grace and pushed the agenda of works...for every time mercy has not triumphed over judgement...for every time I simply thought I couldn't afford to be gracious...or lenient...or giving...

I mean praise be to Gawd, but the more that I have encountered and received the Love of God over the years the less I do this...because you simply can't hang around Jesus and not become merciful...gracious...tender hearted...and generous...but maaaan I have such such SUCH a long way to go. Having this encounter with the guy on the train definitely reminded me afresh of just how far I have to go...and how much I have to learn about true grace...about true love...about Christlike mercy.

And I'm not saying for one minute that faithfulness doesn't reward...faithfulness DOES 100% without a shadow of doubt bring Gods rich favour, multiplication (Matthew 25) and blessing into our lives...with God you absolutely reap what you sow...He is ridiculously lavish to those that give of themselves and those that do yield to the processes...those that do obey...those that labour...those that can be trusted...and even when you may not see the reward on earth you know hands down the reward is there in heaven...a reward so glorious and so worth pursuing.

Yet God is good all the time. He is inherently good and His grace is simply undeserving. His favour is unmerited. None of us could EVER qualify for what He has given us...For I myself am a recipient of God's scandalous grace that has so lavishly been poured out in my life even though I am not qualified in any shape or form...there is a crazy unmerited favour that has exploded my soul day in day out since I became a Christian when what I actually deserved was death. And here I am on countless occasions wanting myself and others to qualify instead of freely receiving grace. Shock horror...none of us can deem who is or isn't qualified...none of us can judge...all of us must endeavour as much as we are able to, to choose mercy over judgement.

It's simply the scandal of grace - a scandalous deed that we will continuously, on a daily basis in our lives, have the opportunity to extend to those around us...whether they deserve it or not...whether they qualify or not.  And I pray that when we are next found in a situation that warrants mercy over judgement...grace over works...that we will be like Jerry just wanting to bless even though it may not be earned...rather than his friend who simply didn't recognise that he could have partook of the scandal of grace without any cost to himself. And that for me I realise is the key...often we think we can't afford to be merciful...or giving...or gracious...that somehow if we give away that which is not deserved that we will lose something...often it's a fear of losing face...or losing an important lesson...or a crucial principle...but most often than not I learn afresh that when it comes to being gracious...we simply can't afford not to.

xx

A Mere Illusion

The theme of this year’s Glamour Women of the Year Awards is “Sisterhood; a celebration of women being seen, heard and uplifted by other women.” Ironically, to make the trans community feel more seen, heard and uplifted, the magazine, has taken to redefining womanhood altogether, and featured nine biological men, who now identify as female, on the cover of their ‘Awards’ Issue. Dubbed “The Dolls,” sporting slogan tees, glossy make up and heels, the award winners were celebrated for their trailblazing work in fashion, music, charity and activism.

In an accompanying article, they reveal some of their achievements, as well as their deep longings to “work, love and exist with dignity’ and their pain, fears and sense of marginalisation. A marginalisation that has intensified, following the Supreme Court ruling earlier this year, clarifying gender as biological, and subsequently, excluding trans women from womanhood. As I have read the article, my heart has ached, considering their pain and how the Supreme Court ruling, has no doubt increased the trauma, and insecurity they have felt.

Yet as painful as this Supreme Court ruling has been for the transgender community, it is a ruling rooted, not just in law, but also in basic biology, in reality itself - and most importantly, in the Word of God. Because the truth is that as heart breaking as the torment of gender dysphoria is, hormone replacement therapies, puberty blockers or gender affirming surgeries are unable to turn a man into a woman or a woman into a man. Cosmetically, one can attempt to look, feel, dress, behave or sound like the opposite gender, but at the core of our biological and spiritual make up, our sex and gender are unchangeable. They are defined by God (Genesis 1:27-28) and our gender is intricately woven into our very divine purpose here on earth.

And when we deny this fundamental reality, one that has existed for thousands of years, and choose instead to play God and redefine gender, this can never truly bring wholeness. It may temporarily satisfy a much deeper need, but ultimately it feeds a delusion, which will only lead to further brokenness. And this is essentially what Glamour Magazine is doing, in its bid to be inclusive, it is carelessly celebrating men as women, and far from advancing the cause for women, it is in fact presenting a lie. Yet this is unsurprising, given Webster defines the word ‘glamour,’ as "a spell or charm, as one which deceives the sight.”  This word ‘glamour’ was once deeply associated with magic and the occult, and even in its modern sense, it relates to “an exciting and often illusory and romantic attractiveness."

And this unfortunately is precisely what this Award is. It’s an illusion. Much like the trans ideology altogether. And to go along with such a damaging illusion is cruel and immensely costly for everyone involved. And of course, for publications such as Glamour and worldly structures in general, there is much gain to be made, by commercialising, glorifying and misrepresenting people’s pain and brokenness.

But for Christians, not only must we show deep compassion and love for anyone grappling with gender dysphoria, but we must be willing to challenge the lie that is being perpetuated in the guise of transgenderism, because as politically incorrect, harsh or unloving, as it may appear, upholding God’s truth about gender and sexuality, is the most loving thing we can do. Because God created every human being in his image, carefully and lovingly designing every fibre of our original design, to bring him glory, fashioning us for a life of purpose, fulfilment and significance. And culture’s redefining of womanhood does not change this truth.

And despite the great accomplishments ‘The Dolls’ are being celebrated for, they pale in comparison to the divine purpose God has wired them for, found in a relationship with him. Ironically, Glamour global head of editorial content Samantha Barry has coined this year's theme as a “love letter to the sisters we’re born with—and the ones we find along the way.” Yet, there is a greater love letter written to the trans community, by God, in the Bible. Where, despite the confusion, grapples and brokenness experienced in this fallen world, they are “seen, heard and uplifted” by God himself. And if they can courageously reject the glamour of this fading world, to pursue an imperishable eternal award, of being God’s deeply loved sons and daughters, I believe they will discover, so much more, than a mere ‘illusion of sisterhood.’

From Token To Truth

I believe God is doing something very special in these days that we are living in. Yet many Christians seem to be very uncomfortable with what is occurring, because it just doesn’t look like God. It’s way too divisive, too messy, too offensive and too darn controversial for it to be God, apparently. And anyone who thinks this is God, is presumably trés deceived. However I beg to differ. And I would say the complete opposite - that anyone who can’t sense what God is doing in the most unexpected, is in fact the one, who is missing it - and as a result, they are completely missing out on enjoying something very beautiful and praiseworthy and oh so full of the Lord, right here, right now, in our very midst!

And I get why people might miss it. Because, who would have thought that during an age, so increasingly secular and so very anti-Christ, that we would see tens of millions of people across the globe, so deeply awakened by the life and death of a full blown unapologetic Christian like Charlie Kirk, who’s martyrdom was witnessed live on TV in front of their very eyes. That we would witness masses of people, seeking God like never before because of the influence of Christian celebrities like Charlie. Who would have thought his assassination would lead of global events, stadiums, sporting events, countries and parliaments holding memorials to this mighty man of God across the world.

Who would have thought his funeral attended by 100,000 people and broadcast to over 200 million people at least, would see world leaders holding the highest position in government, in the Church and across culture paying tribute to him in the only truly fitting way - by praising God and sharing the Gospel! Wow!! Who would have imagined the gospel being preached again and again so boldly, so passionately, so sincerely by men and women of the highest influence in the entire world.

Who would have thought we would see a political March in London led by an f-ing and blinding, once football hooligan, yet recently saved political prisoner which would involve anywhere between a million people again hearing the gospel time and time again. Worship and prayers opening up the March and the name of Jesus being proclaimed repeatedly what, every 500 metres?! Who would have thought we would see thousands upon thousands of football hooligan-esq, Union Jack clad lager-louts, chanting Christ is King alongside profanities and proclamations to sack the Prime Minister.

Yet right here, imbedded within the frailties, complexities and profanities of our broken societies, within realms of culture, within the highways and byways, God seems to be revealing Himself in such precious and praiseworthy ways. Seriously, who would ever have imagined that this is how God would answer our endless petitions for worldwide revival and our cries for His mercy upon this generation? Who would have imagined that God would show up in such unimaginable yet beautiful ways as this?

Yet for many, they unfortunately can’t imagine that this is in fact God answering prayers or showing up. For many, believers, boldly proclaiming the Gospel and evangelising the lost at Political Marches or standing alongside the President of the United States and sharing the saving grace of Christ in front of hundreds of millions of people is Christian Nationalism. It’s an unsavoury mixing of Christ with Politics. It’s tribal and aggressive. Militant, not humble. It’s idolatry. And it’s intimidating. It’s carnal. And it’s deception.

Yet I beg to differ. As someone who has been smack bang in the centre of what much of the Church are describing as Christian Nationalism, their description simply does not describe me or my heart and nor does it describe those that I know who are choosing to be Salt and Light, boldly representing Jesus, as a city on a hill, unafraid to get grimy in the highways and byways of culture shining His light in the darkest of places.

Those who are willing to share the love of God with the lost in the unsavoury places that most Christians wouldn’t touch with a barge pole, who are willing to be misunderstood, persecuted, who are following Jesus’ command to occupy until He comes by being on the front line in every culture in society. And so contrary to what is being defined as Christian Nationalism I believe it’s Christianity 101 actually - it’s utterly biblical, utterly necessary and utterly God’s heart!

Now does it mean that there isn’t tokenism there? That every single person who is seemingly singing worships songs in stadiums or crying Christ is King in Marches is fully understanding what they are singing? No. Does it mean that every single person at the marches, memorials or on social media platforms seeking this ‘trendy’ Christ Who is all of a sudden in ‘Vogue’ are genuine, bonafide seekers of God and new Christians who will stay the course? Far from it.

But does it mean that within all the tokenism, the clumsiness, the complexities and shortcomings of humanity that is God nevertheless moving? Yes, absolutely yes. Does it mean that people are being saved? Yes! Getting delivered? Yes! Comforted? Yes! Awakened? Yes!!!! And so, even with all the unconventional components of that which is happening across the earth - the seemingly erring, clumsy, unsavoury aspects that appear on the surface to be utterly undignified, unattractive, inconvenient, uncomfortable, non-straightforward, messy and complex, I’ll still take this as a holy move of God, with arms wide open shouting ‘bring it on Lord’.

Because even if it’s tokenism I know He’ll eventually bring truth. Even if it’s ugly, I know He’ll make it beautiful. Even if all this is uncomfortable He’ll bring rest, even if it’s offensive He’ll bring conviction. Even if it seems controversial, He’ll release love. Because God is in the business of doing the impossible, with the most impossible circumstances and amongst the most impossible people. He is more than able to turn hearts. Turn tides. And turn tables. He can tenderise our souls, pierce our hearts and melt a generation to long for Him.

Yet I believe He often uses the most unlikely, unimpressive, unattractive means to draw people close and reveal Himself. Isn’t that what He did with when Jesus walked the earth and hung out with sinners? When many people may have looked as His choice of disciples or companions and voiced their concerns by saying…“Nah that’s not the kind of religion I’m into…or Nah that’s not the kind of sinful people who should be connecting with someone claiming to be God.”

And as the many religious people watched him do things in a completely unconventional and often super controversial way, they may have also invariably questioned the way He was choosing to reveal Himself and concluded that “Nah that doesn’t look like the Messiah at all.” Or how about when they would have seen the Lord completely naked hanging there at the Cross at Calvary, with His head literally smashed in, back pierced to the bone, skin falling off, bloodied from head to toe and looking like an absolute mess?

They may have thought that was completely pathetic, this so called God allowing the Romans and Jewish leaders to put Him on the cross. “Nah that can’t be God. No way. Too messy. Too ugly. Too grimey.” And so they ridiculed and slandered our Precious Jesus, mocking Him, spitting at Him, not recognising that God deliberately chose Him to become utterly weak, ugly, offensive and surrendered, so He could show His love and power through His weakness. So He could use the foolish things to confound the wise.

And I think this is a little bit of what we are seeing now. In the ugliness, frailty, complexities and shortcomings of fragile humanity we are seeing our beautiful God show up with His love and power. Using the foolish things to confound the wise. And in the midst of what looks so shockingly sinful, offensive and down right ugly to some, our religious mindsets, bias’, boxes and blind spots all are getting triggered. And through it all, God is shaking and shifting the wheat from the chaff. The tokenism from the truth. The relationship from the religion.

And no matter how crazy it all gets or how many people get offended by what’s happening, I genuinely don’t want to miss a moment of it, no matter how uncomfortable, controversial or challenging things might get. And my prayer is that despite the discomfort, the dramas and deceptive media messaging swirling around the Church right now, that we will stay rooted in the Word of God, face fixed on Jesus like flint, where not a single one of us will miss a drop of the beauty of what is happening right now.

And as the glorious rumblings of a messy revival beginning to shake everything in us and around us, may we have eyes to see and ears to hear. May be know Jesus ever so intimately and rightly, as He leads us all, with His love and truth and may He receive the reward that He is worthy of. x

A MESSY MAJESTIC MARCH

The night before the Unite the Kingdom March I came across several posts on TikTok from both nonbelievers and Christians saying that under no circumstances should you go to the March. It was apparently gonna be full of trouble-making, right wing fascists and racist nationalists, civil unrest was apparently gonna break out - and it apparently wasn’t safe or ‘appropriate’ to be out of your house that day - especially if you were a Christian. Charlie Kirk’s assassination had also just happened days before and so fear and frustration was heightened about being anywhere near a March, led by someone 'so political' like Tommy Robinson and with all his followers.

I obviously ignored all the posts because there was no way I was gonna to miss this march. Not only had it been marked in my diary since July, but all the fear and caution around it, made me even more determined to be there. My reasons for wanting to be there were firstly and most importantly, to share the Gospel. Secondly to put a stake in the ground as a Christian, to declare afresh that this nation belongs to Jesus and can only experience true freedom, under the Lordship of Jesus Christ because without Jesus, this nation is basically up poo’s creek. And then thirdly, because I love Tommy Robinson and have done so for the last twelve years, praying for both his salvation, wellbeing and protection.

And because of this last reason, what made being at this March even more important for me, was that Tommy has recently began following Jesus, which was such an answer to prayer and this was clearly something not only impacting his life in a significant way, but it was clearly also beginning to have an impact upon millions of patriots in this nation, who follow Tommy. I also felt like many others do, that all that had been going on with the UK and globally, as well as the growing witness of bold Christians and of course Charlie Kirk’s assassination, was drawing a generation here in the UK, towards the Lord in a significant way. And so I knew for a fact, that Jesus was going to be at this March. And praise Him galore, because He totally, totally was.

And irrespective of how the mass media portrayed it or how some Christians who weren’t at the March, seem to talk about the march, as someone who was actually there, I can tell you that the Kingdom of heaven was definitely at hand, the Holy Spirit was definitely there and Jesus was meeting people in gloriously humbling and dazzling ways. These are my thoughts about the march and mainly about how I personally saw the Lord move:

For a start, I have genuinely never ever evangelised somewhere so welcoming, so gracious and so open to the Spirit. The amount of people encouraging us as we shared the Gospel was so beautiful. Especially the men constantly coming up to my friend Dominic and showing him so much love.

The atmosphere was super pleasant and there was a sense of hope in the air. The behaviour considering the million plus people there, and the amount of alcohol and drugs being consumed was actually super calm and pretty decent (apart from when I saw a man urinating in a cup and another man who booed me when I was preaching, but then all the men around him told him to be quiet and told me to just ignore him, before helping me get down from where I had been preaching).

At times, people were so quick to sing along with hymns. At one point before Dominic even started preaching, the people at the march started singing hymns themselves, independently.

I prayed with countless people. Every time I approached people to ask if I can pray for them, aside from one man, every single person said yes. In fact, the majority of them responded with ‘yes please’. Whenever I would ask what people wanted prayer for, frequently grown men would say ‘for this country please’. I then explained to each and every one of them that this country needed Jesus and that if we are going to pray for the well-being and freedom of this country then we must pray for Jesus’s Lordship to return over this country and for it to return once again to Judeo-Christian values. Explaining that this was the only solution. And that if they agreed with me, then this is what we would be praying for together - in full agreement.

And every single time, every single one of them, agreed that this is what they wanted - and then we bowed our heads and prayed - sometimes I prayed this with one person, sometimes a few people and at other times, groups of 4-5 grown men were standing in a circle with me, all holding hands praying for Jesus’s Lordship to be restored over this nation. I prayed with people who had mental health issues and depression who wanted to be set free from tormenting thoughts, I prayed with little kids, entire families. I prayed with teenagers struggling with their GCSE’s. I prayed with countless men and women who were just beginning on a journey with God or exploring.

I prayed with baby Christians to find a church and grow in the Lord, another to return to a home group, another man on a 12 Step programme battling with addiction who had relapsed that week because of fresh anxiety around Charlie Kirk’s murder. We prayed together and he took notes in his phone about what kind of Church he should look for while on his 12 Steps programme. I prayed with a man clearly involved in the occult who after initially being resistant to prayer but then said ‘yes please’ the second time I offered, after he saw how his girlfriend was being touched by the Lord.

One of the very first encounters I had, involved praying for a man who I sensed knew the Lord when he was younger. I began to weep as the Lord’s Spirit came upon me and I said to him, you knew the Lord, as a child didn’t you? He nodded and said ‘yes I did, but then I was sexually abused’. Right there, in the centre of the March, with chanting and marching and singing and drinking and smoking, here was a man that people would look at and might label a racist or hooligan because he’s at this march, but the reality is that he was just broken, like all of us, in need of a Saviour.

After the second time I preached, I again came over with the Lord’s compassion so strongly, weeping, repeating over and over to everyone just how much Jesus loved them - and a man and woman who randomly stood in front of me watching, listening to me preach, wept too. The Lord’s presence literally felt tangible at times.

And so to hear this march being described so inaccurately, by people who were not even there, is honestly just so sad to witness. I genuinely wish more believers had been there sharing the love of the Lord. Because this was a precious opportunity to be with a million plus people, who are made in the image of God, some of whom are hungry for the Lord, with willing hearts, ripe and ready for Him to invade their world, even if the way God chooses to do it, is at a Unite the Kingdom March - one of the least likely places one would seemingly expect to find God. Yet the truth is, that this is exactly where we can expect to find God. In seemingly sinful places. Just like we found Jesus hanging around tax collectors and prostitutes.

And so, we should also totally expect to find Him in the darkest, most unconventional places - in politics, in Hollywood, in gaming, in strip clubs, brothels, nightclubs, football matches, college campuses, classroom, street corners, in the highways and byways in our world - through us!!! Yet these are the places that much of the Church will probably deem far too worldly for us, to even set foot in. But then, who will go into those spaces and places, and meet with the lost, if not us?

And of course when we go into those places, it’s not the ‘world’ that we are going there to be like. It's not the world's agenda we are going to align with. But it is the lost ‘world’ we must be longing to reach for Jesus. And it’s only in close proximity with Jesus, that we will be able to discern one kind of ‘world’ from the other kind of ‘world’.

The Bible uses the word ‘Kosmos’ - meaning ‘World’ in six ways. One of theses definitions of ‘world’ refers to 'a godless system - hostile to the cause of Christ’ (1 John 2:15-17). This is the World System led by the spirit of the world. But there is another definition of ‘World’ which is referring to ‘the inhabitants of the world’ (John 3:16) who are the lost, that Jesus died for. And it’s this second definition that should compel us to BOLDLY interrupt the godless systems of the world, not to become like them or to bow to them, align with them or come under them - but to release Jesus's lordship over them, and to reach the lost inhabitants of the world’ inside of them. And that is what I believe all the Christians that I personally know of who were at the march, were being driven by. And will continue to be driven by, no matter what it comes across as.

And of course, some of what is happening right now at places like this March will certainly be tokenism, where people want to take pictures with the Cross of Christ like some kind of badge, along with those who are just jumping on the bandwagon of seemingly 'cool' Christianity which is currently looking kinda sexy and strong and powerful; with a cause worth flighting for as you look at admirable conservatives, audaciously leading the charge, and as you watch bold street preaching on TikTok going viral, and of course when you see someone like Charlie Kirk being martyred for both his Christian and political views. Yet within the ‘tokenism’, within the potential 'Jesus is King' trend, within the coarse swearing, the chanting and the seemingly nationalist movement full of right wing politics such as this march, a beautiful move of God is beginning to bubble up.

And very similarly, within the 100 million plus people watching Charlie Kirk’s funeral and hearing the gospel untold times, within a generation arising, awakening, seeking something significant to truly stand for, is a move of God beginning to happen. Within the demonstration of the most powerful man in office across the globe, even in his successes, his position, his stature, shortcomings and his flaws, glorifying God so boldly, with a cabinet passionately following suit - it is a move of God, beginning to happen. And whether anyone recognises it or not, likes it or not, accepts it or not, I personally am so deeply encouraged by what is happening right now, because we are seeing intercessory prayers spanning decades, coming to fulfilment right now, in our very midst.

And just because it might not look like what we think it should look like, it doesn’t mean it’s not God. In fact, on the contrary, a gloriously messy, humbling, unpredictable, uncomfortable, even down right offensive revival, seems to me, to be far more like a potential move of the Lord, than any of us would probably prefer. And actually, I don’t care what it looks like, to be honest. I don’t care if it shatters my religiosity, if it offends my mind, dismantles my spiritual pride, removes my biases and exposes my blind spots, if it humbles, breaks and challenges me, I just wanna be smack bang in the centre of it, encountering the glory of Jesus dazzling in the grime - with my eyes wide open, a heart that is broken and burning, and hopefully one that is pure enough and tender enough to let Jesus do what He wants to do - no holds barred. So that He may receive the reward - a reward that He is truly worthy to receive, in our generation.

And so I pray, Precious Precious Jesus do have Your way fully and totally in our generation - beautiful, beautiful King. Prepare Your beautiful bride Lord Jesus, Make us ready for You, however You want. Make us like You. Teach us how to love. Make us one. x

A Tribute To Julie Anderson. My Spiritual Beautiful Mum. x

Julie Anderson

16th May 1945 - 22 February 2025

Julie Anderson. A devoted lover of Jesus. A beautiful wife, mother and grandmother. A Pioneer. An apostolic, intercessor who literally changed the spiritual landscape of this nation. She was a spiritual mum to many - including me. She was a natural beauty. A style icon. Fearless. Passionate. Enigmatic. Anointed to the nines. And heaven simply oozed out of her.You see, Pastor J, as I affectionally call her, had been radically marked by a supernatural encounter she had experienced in 1971, whilst at a party in the South of France, in Keith Richard’s villa. That summer, she had restlessly searched for an eternal purpose greater than the rock and roll, pools and parties that she was immersed in. Increasingly disenchanted by the world of the Beatles, Rolling Stones and A-List celebrities surrounding her, a sudden out of body experience would bring her face to face with Jesus, rendering her utterly captivated by Him. 

Awestruck by His gentle, accepting love. His awesome, invigorating and impregnating peace and joy, this life-altering moment and so many more that would follow, would place the deepest desire within her to see heaven on earth. Not just in a supernatural spiritual encounter, but all day, every day. And so for the rest of her life, she would live to reveal heaven. To make Jesus known, spending her life interceding to see His Kingdom come.  And for her spiritual children and those around her, we all experienced so much more of heaven, because of her. Because of her surrender. Her hunger for Jesus. Her sacrifice. She was a spiritual general. She truly knew God. And when we were around her, we knew more of Him too. We would glean from her. We wanted to spend time with her. We wanted to host the presence of God, just like we saw her host the presence of God. 

When she fell three years ago, it was devastating. To see our beautiful Pastor J become bedridden, no more pioneering, no longer blazing a trail. No longer waging a war. No longer commanding the day. Very rarely speaking, prophesying or making us smile, with her wit and wisdom. no longer cracking jokes with Pastor Rod, no longer calling us babe. Yet we all knew that no matter what things looked like on the outside, she was full of God’s spirit and power on the inside. She still loved us. She was still a pioneer, still a war horse. Still a fiery one. And nothing could diminish the labour of love she had poured out, nor erase the legacy of prayer and intercession she had established in this generation. 

This personally became so real to me last year when I hosted a conference, that resembled much of what Pastor J had role-modelled to me through her incredible ministry over the years, as I had served her, gleaned from her and sat under her anointing. And as I considered the heavyweight mandate of the gathering that God was having me spearhead, the hard ground that needed breaking, the level of intercession that needed praying, the war that needed waging and the victory that needed releasing, I just knew I had to wear something of Pastor J’s for this conference. 

Not only because Pastor J is the ultimate Style Queen, so her blazers are obviously stunning designer pieces, but because, as one of her spiritual daughters I needed to clothe myself in the ‘mantle’ of our trail blazing, tide-turning, pioneering, hell-scaring, spiritual mama, who knew how to pray, slay and command the day!  

I needed to step on the shoulders of a giant that had gone before me and to continue the trail-blazing, history-making legacy of this incredible woman who had poured into our lives so richly and shown us so powerfully what it is to go after the things of God. And although in that moment in time, she was lying in bed unable to pioneer, intercede or walk in her calling in the way that she had done for so many years, yet her children were arising and taking the baton, carrying her DNA and continuing her legacy. 

And as I found myself rereading Pastor J’s book rehearsal the other day, I was freshly struck by her legacy, her unique life, by all that she had experienced both naturally & supernaturally, and by what she carried as a pioneer and an apostolic voice for such a time as this - and I realised that each one of us, all that knew her, all - and  even the earth itself was so utterly blessed & privileged to have even known Pastor J in this realm because this incredible woman seemed to have been made not for earth, but for heaven. 

And earth’s loss is most certainly heaven’s gain. And as Pastor J now finds herself in heaven, once again, face to face with Jesus, all the more awestruck by His gentle accepting love, His awesome, invigorating and impregnating peace and joy - she leaves within us all, a deeper longer for heaven, just like the desire that she so deeply carried and communicated in all that she was and in all that she did. x

Photo credit for Chosen Event images: Chris Mathison

LOVED: DEARLY PRIZED. HIGHLY ESTEEMED.

I do not have words for what happened at The Loved Conference. It was hands down thee most divine gathering I’ve ever been involved in. It was completely and utterly heavenly and our Beautiful Jesus met with us so deeply, so tangibly, He loved us, healed us, restored us, delivered us, stretched us, awakened us, challenged us, brought us into a higher place and did so so so much that my mind cannot even conceive.

I’m undone. Thank you to the incredible LOVED team who are a gift beyond measure. Words cannot articulate how grateful I am for you. I just could not have done this without you. Your love, sacrifice, encouragement and faithfulness humbles me and wrecks me at the same time. So thankful for Pastor Dave and River Church. For my beautiful mum. For all those who sowed into LOVED, creatively, financially, or prayerfully, who supported the vision in any capacity.

And I’m so so SO grateful for those who joined us for LOVED in person and online. Your hunger, humility, vulnerability, boldness, courage and pursuit of Jesus’ reward brings tears to my eyes. Thank you for trusting us with your hearts. We pray for all that was poured out, experienced and received to be sealed and cherished - for it to bear so much fruit and for it to mark your lives for the rest of your days.♥️

If anyone would like the watch the LOVED Livestream you can purchase it here.

SAY HELLO TO THE LIVING IN LIGHT NEW APPAREL COLLECTION

I’m soooo excited to share my latest apparel collection with you. 🕊️

Think bold, comfy, Jesus and joy—all in one! 🌟

It’s a fun, vibey collection for the whole family, and it’s makes the best gifts and I literally love💛 every single piece! Each piece is a conversation starter, a springboard for miracles, a timeless truth that divides soul from spirit and a glimpse into heaven.

I pray these pieces bless you. That they lead to glorious encounters. That as you wear them you feel God’s anointing. I pray that you enjoy how stylish and vibey they are. I pray they make you feel amazing. And I pray Jesus is glorified through this beautiful expression of His beauty.

Now feel free to go browse the pieces and do of course tell everyone to do the same.

Love Bobbi x

FOLLOW HIM

I’m sure you’ll agree with me, that the virtual “follow” culture we live in, is incredibly fickle. Not only does it take up so much of our time, dictate so much of our lives, but I have found that it can also frequently foster quite the superficial loyalty. It’s this surface level conviction that we can seem to subscribe to - where we find ourselves siding with different parties, movements, ideas and doctrines at a click of a button and then once our interest wanes, we get offended or the message no longer resonates with us, we can click off just as quickly.

All. The. Time

And if truth be told, this casually committed, let’s see how things go, kind of flow, can also be the sort of approach we sometimes choose to take, with our Christian walk. But that’s just not the kind of vibe Jesus calls us into, when we say yes to Him. On the contrary, He calls us to follow Him as servants. As disciples - and biblically, disciples are defined as learners, who are either curious, convinced or committed. Now, I can’t speak for anyone else, but I know the kind of disciple I want to be. I want to be fully committed. All. The. Time. I want to be the kind of disciple Jesus truly deserves to have. The kind of disciple, we see modelled in the Early Church.

Yet, if I were to be real with you, I repeatedly miss the mark of being the sort of disciple, Jesus calls us to be. You see, as much as we wax lyrical about being disciples for Jesus, in reality, our version of what it is to be a disciple, most often than not, completely short-changes Jesus. This is because, His definition of what a disciple is, is far costlier than we are often willing to pay for.

A lifetime membership of denying ourselves

You see, when we say Yes to Jesus, we are meant to be signing up to conform wholly to His example in living and, if need be, in dying. We are in essence, subscribing to a lifetime membership of denying ourselves - by forgetting, ignoring, disowning and losing sight of ourselves and our own interests. We are being enlisted into a lifelong loyalty scheme, of siding with Jesus’ party, continually, cleaving steadfastly to Him and taking up our cross daily; Of taking pleasure in Him, above every other relationship and completely losing our (lower) life here on earth, on account of Him.

Yet, the beauty is that if we are willing to actually be true disciples, and are willing to pay the price, it is this very forsaking of our ‘lower’ life here on earth, for our Precious Jesus, that will lead us to finding the ‘higher’ life ‘in Him’. It is on this narrow road, of leaving the broad wide path of the world behind, that true treasure will be found. True identity, validation and significance will be discovered. It is here, in pursuit of the only One, truly worthy to be followed, that true contentment will be experienced. It is on this often marginalised, persecuted and painful path of steadfastly clinging to Him, that the highest love and deepest intimacy will be attained.

The privilege of following

Yes it is costly. But it is nothing compared to the price, He paid for us. May we therefore be those who will gladly let go of every false loyalty to the things of this world, in order to follow hard after the Lover of our soul, the One who gave it all for us. May we be like Mary who broke open her costly alabaster jar and spent it all on Him. May we be like the disciples and martyrs of generations before, who shed their blood unto death, for the Beautiful One, the Servant King – Who is the greatest example, that we could ever have the privilege of following, not just in this world, but for all eternity. 

He Knows. He Cares. He Loves.

God knows what we love. He knows how we are wired. He knows us inside out and He lavishes us with His goodness. I was reminded of this so beautifully as I recently celebrated my birthday and experienced the most beautiful birthday of my life. It was a kiss from heaven. The stuff the sweetest dreams are made of. And I wasn’t expecting it.

The reason it was so precious is because I just don’t experience birthdays that I really really enjoy. Like in my heart. You know, in my inners. Don’t get me wrong - I have had some lovely lovely times celebrating past birthdays, like the lush birthday I had in Paris, or the one where I enjoyed Wimbledon with some of my girlfriends. Then there was the glorious 3 day lovefest for my fortieth, surrounded by so many friends celebrating me with so much care and generosity which was then topped up with a surprise trip to Marbs! And most recently there was the lavish all expenses birthday trip I was blessed with by my brother and his girlfriend, to Israel - one of my most fave places on the planet.

Yet somehow I have found myself at a place, since the pandemic where lots has changed in my life, all of which I am so grateful for - but birthdays have for the most part, become a moment in time each year, that I just don’t enjoy. Until this year, that is. Because this year God properly showed up - in thee most beautiful, stunning way and lavished me with all my favourite things, all beautifully wrapped up in the big fat packaging of His loveliness and totally took my breath away. Wow.

It started off with a beautiful time of being blessed by a friend with a pottery painting class. And then we ended up chinwagging for hours, eating thai food and drinking wine by the river. That is like one of my most favourite things to do, ever. I love love love being by the water, with food, drink and deep convo. The following night a bunch of beautiful ones joined me for a night of Salsa dancing, cocktails and empanadas for pre-birthday celebrations at a gorj YWAM base.

To sow into the work of the kingdom whilst dancing in a godly, holy space surrounded by loved ones was utterly dreamy and so so easy. I loved absolutely everything about this night. I was so beautifully surprised with a cake and loved on all evening. And again it’s like Beautiful Jesus was my party planner and knew what to bring into the mix so that everything was something special that I really love and means so much to me, but I never really say out loud and no knows that these little gestures mean everything to me - apart from Jesus.

My birthday itself was full of so much love. Unexpected blessings, gifts and greetings from friends far and wide. My darling mummy who is visiting from India gave me a huge amount of money to have fun! We went to a lush spa where I had the most delightful time not just getting pampered but in the Sauna meeting a beaut girl who was also enjoying her birthday that day. We screamed and jumped around lols with delight at being birthday buddies.

And then we ended up having the most beautiful time of talking mainly about Jesus and prayed over each other in the Sauna. She began to cry as the Lord started reading her mail and speaking to her through the prayer. She was weeping with joy at encountering Jesus in that way. Like on HER BIRTHDAY! How precious!

When more ladies joined the Sauna, I invited them to join in with our prayers and began to prophecy over them and then I got my mum to bless everyone in the Sauna who was celebrating a birthday. It was so so delightful. A big fat glorious prayerfest happening in a Sauna, on my birthday…sharing Jesus in unconventional places - and seeing His love touching so many - again some of my MOST favourite things on the planet to be doing. I love how He brought that into the mix. Big Sigh. He knows. He cares. He loves. Oh He loves so so well. So so personally.

The rest of the day was so lush. Watching the best Bollywood film, no nudity, swearing or idolatry - just wholesome, inspiring tear jerking cinema that Bollywood used to be renowned for before it went all perverse. Glorious food as glorious restaurants. And shopping! In the sales!! Bargains! I mean come ON! Fave upon fave things I love to do…and things that make me so happy being brought into the birthday mix by our heavenly Father. My heart felt so full.

And then three days later I headed out to Turkey to continue celebrating this amazing birthday that only ten days before I didn’t even want to have. It felt like the longest, loveliest blessing and I felt so seen, known and cared for by the Lord. He is so so sweet. So kind. So loving. And caring. What a Beautiful Father and Friend. What a Precious Lover of our Soul.

He knows exactly what floats our boat. He cares about the things we care about. The things that make us happy. The little things that delight our soul and fill us with joy. They may be nothing to others, but Jesus knows that they mean something to us. He knows how to bring joy where there may have been sorrow. He know how to turn ashes into beauty when we are least expecting it. He makes dead things alive and He is constantly in the business of showing us just how deeply He loves us. And knows us intimately.

He is so trustworthy. And He is a Redeemer. Even when we don’t know something needs redeeming. And I am not sure what things you may think are always going to be graves in your world but I want to encourage you that He truly makes graves into gardens. He surprises us with His lavish love and when we least expect it, He shows up in the most personal, intimate way to make us know just how deeply and fully we are known and loved by Him. x

“Blessed (happy, fortunate, to be envied) is the man whose strength is in You, in whose heart are the highways to Zion. Passing through the Valley of Weeping (Baca), they make it a place of springs; the early rain also fills [the pools] with blessings.” Psalm 84:5-6 x

SEXPOSED 2024: THE MATURITY OF THE BRIDE

Sexposed 2024! A three day conference uprooting the lies around sexuality and upholding the truth, in love. What a gathering!!What a journey?! What an experience. But I’m not gonna lie - spearheading this mandate was one of the hardest things I have ever done. It was painful, uncomfortable, crushing for the soul and deeply taxing for the body. And I wanted to give up so many times.

The greatest place of grief for me was what felt like huge disengagement from the majority of the Church, from leaders, parents, individuals. It broke my heart. On a daily basis. I would consider the passivity. The ignorance. The slumber. Yet despite me continuously releasing a clarion call about how crucial this conference was for us as the body of Christ and for the world around us, in which we are called to be Salt and Light in, there seemed to be little response!

I felt so saddened knowing that that enemy satan has had a field day with our sexuality for thousands of years and not only has he brought brokenness and dysfunction to individuals, families and cultures through his attack on our sexuality but now he was blatantly after the kids. And the only ones that could push against his ruthless attacks was us - the Church - Christ within us, the hope of Glory. Yet the majority of the Church seemed uninterested.

How could we, as the Church just ignore all this sexual dysfunction and brokenness. How were we all just settling for counterfeit intimacy. And for porn and masturbation as the norm. And sex abuse. And sex trafficking. And child prostitution. And millions of unborn lives being murdered through abortion. And children being sexualised. And genitalia being chopped off due to delusion and people not knowing they are dearly loved sons and daughters of God. And enslavement to lust. And confusion about our gender. And promiscuity. And homosexual behaviours. And shame about our body. And looking for love in all the wrong places. And boring sex or sexless marriages. And repressed sex drives. And shame around sexuality. And ungodly soul ties. And a lonely society. And fear of intimacy. And divided hearts when worshipping Jesus. And a timid, weak, soiled bride of Christ.

And there I was imploring leaders, parents, individuals, families - to repond to this clarion call. Pleading. Explaining…we have a window, to partner with God. To not just come into a deeper place of glorious, wholeness and intimacy with the Lord as His bride, experiencing the deepest communion with Him and discovering the unrivalled joys of sacred sexuality in Christ, but also to turn the tide of this plague of sexual immorality and to be the salt and light in this sexuality broken, dark and wounded world - for such a time as this.

Yet aside from the precious remnant championing is cause, there was very little response. And yet the sad reality is that actually for the last 50-60 years, this has been the status quo for us as the church. We have unfortunately done very little about the deteriorating sexual landscape of our society. To think that marriage has been made legal between two men or two women on our watch. So many babies have died on our watch. Paedophilia has gone from being something that was a crime to now being defined merely as a sexual orientation - on our watch.

And we’ve been so passive when this has happened. We’ve not only failed to be the solution but we have unfortunately contributed to the problem.

And as I approached the 1 month til conference mark back in early March and had less than 20 people booked, a cost of £15K to meet and what seemed like a wasted effort, feeling utterly utterly crushed, suddenly the Lord spoke to me very clearly about why there was very little response to this clarion call and to this gathering.

He shoed me that the reason whole divine assignment is so crushing and painful is because through Sexposed, we are breaking new ground. He then led me to the words of the worship song, New Wine.

In the crushing, In the pressing

You are making new wine

In the soil, I now surrender

You are breaking new ground

So I yield to You into Your careful hand

When I trust You I don't need to understand

Make me Your vessel, Make me an offering

Make me whatever You want me to be

I came here with nothing

But all You have given me

Jesus bring new wine out of me

And then he took me to Luke 5:37-39 AMP:

“And no one puts new wine into old wineskins; otherwise the new [fermenting] wine will [expand and] burst the skins and it will be spilled out, and the skins will be ruined. But new wine must be put into fresh wineskins. And no one, after drinking old wine, wishes for new; for he says, ‘The old is fine.’”

He showed me that He was releasing a new wine it is only those that have the new wineskins who could handle it. That it would take a real maturity and expnading of the mind to be able to carry what He was releasing. And that unfortunately most did not have the new wine. And in order to preserve those with the old wineskins as well as ensuring the new wine did not get wasted only those with the new wineskins would be at Sexposed, by God’s design. Wow.

He said there were many who were content with the old wine and did not know they needed the new wine. These were the ones who felt a measure of healing was enough. Or a measure of deliverance was enought. Or their own deliverance and freedom was enough. But unfortunately weren’t yet mature enough to be salt and light to the sexually broken around them.

He showed me that was not so much of a public event where people could observe or spectate but rather a strategic military operation where those who understood the principles of war would come together to strategise warfare, coordinate military operations, make plans and come to agreements, understand the enemy, take orders for our Bridegroom and Commander in Chief and execute military operations from that deep place of intimacy. In order to dismantle the altars of darkness and reestablish altars to the Lord. All from a place of rest, intimacy, purity and consecration.

I also had a sense that there for this gathering, there was an elaborate table prepared by our commander in chief in the presence of our enemies. Where He would be anointing our heads with oil preparing us for battle. But that this whole military operation was taking place inside the bedroom chamber. But from this place of the chamber and seated at this elaborate table we were able to control the battleground. With the sceptre of authority given to us by Our King, our Bridegroom and Commander in Chief. 

And this is exactly what it ended up being. And it was glorious. Utterly utterly glorious. And the way Jesus so kindly and powerfully gave me vision and understanding of what He was doing, was thee most encouraging invigorating, inspiring, thing ever. I have absolutely no doubt that Sexposed was birthed in God’s heart and executed by His design and His desire. And that’s why there was such a fight. It was mind blowing to be part of what He did both in the natural and in the Spirit. And I am crazy humbled and properly awestruck to have been part of it.

I simply could not have done it without the phenomenal Sexposed team. WOW!!! What a gift! Thank you in particular to the Core Team who have been the greatest strength. A huge thank also to the incredible ministries, ministers and worship leaders/teams that were involved in Sexposed. The way you all gave of yourself, championed and served the vision, and at the same time encouraged me! Seriously guys thank you!!!

Beautiful friends and family who kept encouraging & praying! My River Church and CCF Church family! Amazing spiritual parents - honestly thank you. And such heartfelt thanks to all the intercessory, prophetic, apostolic and shepherding voices who helped carry and birth this vision.

Such a heartfelt to everyone who attended in person, on livestream and who partnered with the vision and sowed into it. God clearly showed me that He was pouring out new wine and those with the new wineskins would come. Thank you for carrying the new wine and allowing it to expand you.

Thank You Jesus. You continue to be absolutely dazzling. Faithful beyond measure. And even when saying yes to you can feel like the scariest, riskiest and hardest thing ever - free-falling in you is still the safest, richest, most live-giving way to live. Thank You for trusting us Precious Jesus, You are beautiful.♥️

“Let us rejoice and shout for joy [exulting and triumphant]! Let us celebrate and ascribe to Him glory and honor, for the marriage of the Lamb [at last] has come, and His bride has prepared herself. She has been permitted to dress in fine (radiant) linen, dazzling and white—for the fine linen is (signifies, represents) the righteousness (the upright, just, and godly living, deeds, and conduct, and right standing with God) of the saints (God’s holy people).

Revelation 19:7-8

Photography Credit: Kokila Paramanantham and Jesse-Steve Amartey